


Two Cats and Two Owls

by keijisramen



Series: texting 101 [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Chaos, Drunk Texting, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Multi, Polyamorous Character, Polyamory, Romantic Fluff, Texting, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:34:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 3,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25437784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keijisramen/pseuds/keijisramen
Summary: Bokuakakuroken texting. why not add another texting chat ?akaashi: bokuto do you have any shaving cream?bokuto: no i don't like the way it tastesy i  k e s
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou/Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: texting 101 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1818958
Comments: 55
Kudos: 208





	1. bokuakakuroken is rlly just key smashes

_bokuto has added pretty setter, kenma and cat daddy to the chat_

bokuto: HEY HEY HEY figured if we're dating we should have a chat yes?

cat daddy: BROKUTOOOOOOOOO YES SO SMART

kenma: bye

cat daddy: 🥺🥺🥺🥺

pretty setter: Bokuto-san do you have any shaving cream?

bokuto: no, I don't like the way it tastes 

pretty setter: what

kenma: wait-

bokuto: what?

cat daddy: dude you eat shaving cream?

pretty setter: do you eat shaving cream??? 

bokuto: no. why would I eat it if I dont like the taste??


	2. depressed setters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cat daddy: kuroo 
> 
> cat: kenma
> 
> pretty setter: akaashi 
> 
> owl daddy: bokuto

_cat daddy has changed kenmas name to cat and bokutos to owl daddy_

cat daddy: there 

owl daddy: BROKUROOOOOOO

cat daddy: BROKUTOOOOOOOOO 

pretty setter: Bokuto-san have you done your work. 

owl daddy: no mom I havent I s2g. bye guys

cat: hey akaashi?

pretty setter: ? 

cat: if i cut off my leg and swing it at you am I kicking you or hitting you?

cat daddy: kenma-

pretty setter: you'll probably end up mentally scarring me over anything else.

cat: but is it considered kicking or hitting 

pretty setter: i- 

pretty setter: why am i receiving this question 

cat: idk figured since bokuto disappeared youd miss the annoyance. 

pretty setter: sometimes quiet is nice.

cat: wow i couldn't agree more 😍

cat daddy: did you two just-

owl daddy: i think they just bashed us bro

cat: no hard feelings. yall just annoying af sometimes. and loud af too

pretty setter: facts ^^^^

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii I can't believe this 

cat daddy: I can tbh

owl daddy: 🥺 gomen everyone 


	3. elemelons

cat daddy: guys

pretty setter: what?

cat daddy: if watermelons exist, why aren't there firemelons, earthmelons and airmelons?

owl daddy: the elemelons 😱

_cat has removed cat daddy and owl daddy from the chat_

pretty setter: what was that for?

cat: i am amazed how smart kuroo is in school then afterwards he just turns into the dumbest giant ive ever met. other than lev.

pretty setter: and you kicked them out for?

cat: i can only handle so much stupid in one day.

pretty setter: imagine trying to manage Bokuto-san. 

cat: why did we agree to date them

pretty setter: feelings?

cat: oh right. gross. 

_pretty setter has added cat daddy and owl daddy back to the chat_

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY ITS GOOD TO BE BACK 

pretty setter: you literally just called me crying to add you back. 

owl daddy: thanks akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii 

pretty setter: mhm.


	4. h e l p

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii I think we should adopt another child.

pretty setter: no.

owl daddy: why not?

cat daddy: where's kenma?

pretty setter: because by adopting a child you actually mean a cat and we already have 24!

pretty setter: I am unsure where kenma is tbh

owl daddy: 25...

cat: hElP

pretty setter: did bokuto kidnap you

cat: I just wanted to play games i-

cat daddy: KITTEN IM ON MY WAY 

cat: actually nah its chill he gave me apple pie and games 

cat daddy: i- 

cat daddy: am I that easy to replace-

pretty setter: Bokuto-san you know better 

owl daddy: do I though? 

cat daddy: oho 

pretty setter: no. 


	5. akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii I NEED ANSWERS 

pretty setter: to what Bokuto-san?

cat daddy: guys?

owl daddy: YOURE SO ATTRACTIVE 

owl daddy: HOW? FOR WHY? WHY? 

pretty setter: i-

owl daddy: HOW ARE YOU ALLOWED TO BE THAT ATTRACTIVE 

cat daddy: he has a point tbh

cat: ^^^

pretty setter: I dont know?

owl daddy: i wanna thank your parents for fucking and blessing us with AN ANGEL NAMED AKAASHI KEIJI

cat: yes yes we must thank them 

pretty setter: i- I don't know what to say?

cat daddy: HES EVEN CUTE FLUSTERED WHAT

owl daddy: UNFAIR


	6. chaos

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii, did it hurt?

pretty setter: what?

owl daddy: when you fell from the vending machine?

pretty setter: .....

owl daddy: cause, cause you're a snack

pretty setter: i-

cat daddy: NICE 

cat: akaashi said something nice today 

owl daddy: oho?

cat daddy: oya?

cat: bokuto was doing something stupid and I asked Akaashi if he was sure 

pretty setter: and i said i was positive I wanted that one 

owl daddy: brb I'm coming over 

pretty setter: Bokuto-san its 3 AM

owl daddy: and? 

pretty setter: go to bed

cat daddy: no we're both coming over lolol 

pretty setter: jesus why

owl daddy: i have to give you all the kisses now

cat daddy: idk I just want to see your pretty face. wish kenma would come 

cat: im streaming. *hisses*

cat daddy: we have upset the kitten 😸 😢 

owl daddy: ONWARDS TO AKAASHIS 

pretty setter: fuck.


	7. I'm unsure what this is

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY 

pretty setter: yes?

owl daddy: kenma and akaashi when the time comes who is taking your virginity 

cat: bold of you to assume im interested in sex

pretty setter: bold of you to assume I'm a bottom 

cat daddy: what gives you top energy?

pretty setter: im ignoring you 

owl daddy: okay theoretically who would you want 

pretty setter: why does it matter 

cat daddy: because he beat me saying you'd want to fuck him over me

pretty setter: now I want kuroo 🙃

cat: hey man. 

pretty setter: what?

cat daddy: oho oho?

cat daddy: jealous kenma?

cat: stfu 

cat: bye 

cat daddy: kitten come back im sorry 

cat: you should be 

pretty setter: Bokuto-san if it matters, yes you.. 

owl daddy: AKAAAAASSSSHHHIIIIII YEEEEESSSS we fucking tonight 

pretty setter: um no. 

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii 😭

pretty setter: we definitely aren't after this conversation lmao 

owl daddy: fuck


	8. 🥺

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm feeling soft because I just finished my added group chat and I absolutely loved it sm. 
> 
> anyways: I was thinking 50 chapters for this texting fic?¿ thoughts ??

owl daddy: can i just say how much I love you guys

cat daddy: BROKUTOOOOOOOOO you absolutely can

owl daddy: BROKUROOOOOOO I love you sm. thanks for being my friend and now boyfriend wowie thanks for putting up with me

cat daddy: if i love you its not putting up with you its just things I love about you 

cat: is bokuto ok

pretty setter: god did you go into dejected mode again?

owl daddy: no. I don't think you all are appreciated enough 

owl daddy: also kuroo that made me soft 🥺😭

cat daddy: i can make you hard 😏 

cat: *hyena laughs *

cat daddy: wow

owl daddy: ANYWAYS kenma ~

cat: what

owl daddy: you are by far the most precious soul other than akaashi. thank you for putting up with me and being my friend as well as my boyfriend 

cat: i-

owl daddy: also for letting me kidnap you and teach me how to play games 

cat: you fed me apple pie it wasn't a big deal-

owl daddy: OMG TAKE MY LOVE DAMNIT

cat: cries how

owl daddy: I DID IT WITH LOVE

cat: cries OK ok! gomen! thank you for your support and love. I love your annoying ass too

owl daddy: 🥺🥺🥺

owl daddy: now onto akaashi keiji 

pretty setter: oh no

owl daddy: oh yes

cat daddy: we already know how sappy this will be

owl daddy: i have never met someone with prettier eyes, let alone a handsome face attached. I love all of your tosses and im grateful you put up with me so much more than they do. I love spending time with you and I never want it to stop. I HIGHKEY just want to lay in bed and comb my fingers through your hair (authorchan wants that too omg). you are under appreciated with all the hard work you do

pretty setter: Bokuto-san I'm crying- I love you 

cat: that was beautiful i-

cat daddy: truly a master piece 🙌 👏 👌 

owl daddy: i love you all sm. thank you

cat: of course we love you too

pretty setter: yeah or else we wouldn't be dating right?

cat daddy: exactly :)


	9. hey hey hey

cat daddy: its cool authorchan forgot about us

cat: how rude

pretty setter: allow her to explain herself 

authorchan: GOMEN GOMEN ALMIGHTY SHIP 🥺🥺🤧🤧 i have been busy with finishing up my courses and did not mean for forget my favorite ship 🤧🤧

owl daddy: i think we should let her slide this time

cat daddy: she makes a compelling argument 

cat: she literally just said whats going on in her life 

pretty setter: we understand the struggles authorchan. thank you very much 

owl daddy: MOVING ON

owl daddy: kenma and i don't spend enough time together 

owl daddy: theres not enough bokuken

cat: probably because most people don't see us together. you're loud, I hate loud. you're energetic and I hate doing things 

pretty setter: they say opposites attract??

owl daddy: like bats

cat daddy: batteries?

owl daddy: yeah that

pretty setter: like magnets?

owl daddy: also that

owl daddy: ANYWAYS KENMA GO ON A DATE WITH ME 

cat: so aggressive i-

pretty setter: if you dont he will go into dejected mode

cat: ugh fine

owl daddy: SCORE

cat daddy: I guess I'll take akaashi out then

pretty setter: pain-in-the-ass-kuroo-san with a gun or on a date?

cat daddy: which do you prefer?

pretty setter: surprise me

authorchan: oh my that concludes this texting chapter!!! 

owl daddy: authorchan it was just getting intense

authorchan: that's the point Bokuto-san. treat kenma well tho ;))

owl daddy: WHY WHY DOES SHE DO THIS

cat: if you're loud again im not going on the date

owl daddy: fine 🥺🤧


	10. Lava, chaos and more chaos

Owl daddy: do you think lava would taste spicy

pretty setter: please dont eat lava......

cat: you do you

pretty setter: kenma no

cat daddy: it might just taste bland and ashy because it’s often rock

owl daddy: thank you, you understand me like no one else

pretty setter: i have a bad feeling about this

cat daddy: what do you mean

pretty setter: do you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you when something is a bad idea?

owl daddy: no

cat: oh

cat: that explains a lot tbh

cat daddy: do you eat bananas with or without the shell

cat: that’s not how....

owl daddy: with

cat: ........

pretty setter: WHAT 

owl daddy: what?

cat: ...........


	11. we lost bokuto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hello i am done with summer courses so I will try to update everything as much as i can until the 24th when I start classes again 🤡💀

cat: we have a map of every place bokuto could be 

pretty setter: .........

pretty setter: we have a map of Japan

cat daddy: we have no idea where hed be

cat: should we count this as a win

pretty setter: NO

pretty setter: Bokuto-san if you have your phone please answer 

cat daddy: BROKUTOOOOOOOOO 

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY BROKUROOOOOOO 

pretty setter: are you fucking kidding me

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii don't be mad 🤪 

pretty setter: kenma lets count this as a win

cat: y e s

owl daddy: r00d

pretty setter: 😌🤏 

owl daddy: kaashi never uses emojis..... ill come back now

pretty setter: 😌

cat: oh god his face is scary...

cat daddy: fr frrrrrrr bokuto run bro

pretty setter: bokuto koutarou 😌

owl daddy: guck I'm on the way. please don't be mad 

pretty setter: good.


	12. math

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY 

owl daddy: what kind of math do tree's do?

cat daddy: TWIGonometry

cat: square roots

pretty setter: geomeTREE

owl daddy: wrong

owl daddy: the answer is tree math

cat: oh

cat daddy: should've known it wouldn't make sense 

owl daddy: it does!!

pretty setter: more than the other comments we made?

owl daddy: well no.but still

pretty setter: i s2g


	13. chicken nuggy

cat: the package of children says to heat up my oven at 400 for 20 minutes 

cat: CHICKEN NUGGY NOT CHILDREN 

cat: omg omg omg 

cat daddy: we knew where you were going 

pretty setter: proof reading is a thing

cat: anyways

cat: but like what about 800 for 10 minutes 

cat daddy: kenma no

owl daddy: sounds smart to mee

pretty setter: please no

cat: better yet 1100 for 5 minutes 

cat daddy: PLEASE STOP 

pretty setter: KENMA NO THATS NOT HOW THAT WORKS

owl daddy: ohohoo ill see you in 5 minutes 

pretty setter: BOKUTO-SAN NO

pretty setter: BAD CAT AND OWL BAD

cat: ..... hisses

owl daddy: but I want chicken nuggy 

pretty setter: i will come over and cook them 

cat: the oven doesn't go as high as 1100...

cat daddy: did you seriously try

cat: ........


	14. misspells

owl daddy: a theif 

cat: thief?

owl daddy: theif

pretty setter: i before e

cat: except after c

cat daddy: thceif

pretty setter: no

cat: i swear you have a 100 in chemistry but you can't English 

cat daddy: I LITERALLY TUTOR YOU BEFORE THE TEST

cat: you right 

cat: i can't do anything today, stress is bad for the baby

cat daddy: ???

owl daddy: what baby?

cat: me

cat: obviously 🙄 

pretty setter: socjeocjwjxjdixijf

cat: i broke akaashi 


	15. Chapter 15

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY 

cat daddy: BROKUTOOOOOOOOO

owl daddy: akaaaaasssshhhiiiiii say hi

owl daddy: BROKUROOOOOOO 

owl daddy: anyways i had a dream I fucked you

cat daddy: you did?

owl daddy: hah gay I wouldn't fuck you

owl daddy: i mean unless 

pretty setter: what the fuck 

cat: i have news for you buddy

cat: you've already done it

owl daddy: HOWD YOU KNOW 

cat daddy: YEAH

pretty setter: you act like we wouldn't find out? while kenma is a bottom the other three of us are switches. 

cat: ............ 

pretty setter: ill buy you a game

cat: 🥰


	16. body swap??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> akaashi is in bokutos body  
> kuroo is in kenmas body  
> bokuto is in kuroos body  
> kenma is in akaashis body 
> 
> thanks <3

owl daddy (akaashi): hey so is anyone ,,,,,, different today....

cat daddy (bokuto): HEY HEY HEY IM THE CAT MAN

pretty setter (kenma): wow akaashi.... this is what its like to be you?

kitten (kuroo): BROKUTOOOOOOOOOO I CAN FINALLY SEE KENMA NAK-

pretty setter: dont finish that sentence and DONT YOU DARE!

kitten: bet

pretty setter: i will end you so fast

kitten: ..............

cat daddy: but youd be ending yourself......

pretty setter: perfect

owl daddy: bokuto-san.... please forgive me...

cat daddy: whatd you do???

owl daddy: i saw your,,,,,,,,,,,

cat daddy: my????

owl daddy: p3n1s...

kitten: youre not mature enough to have s3x

owl daddy: um im typing the word but author-chan is blocking it

author-chan: gomen, young readers!

kitten: lame :/ how else will they learn

author-chan: not from me!!!!

kitten: but didnt you-

author-chan: NOT ANOTHER WORD!

cat daddy: shes scary fkefesnfjsdnfdsjnf

pretty setter: sometimes when i. think youre straight you keyboard smash and prove me wrong

owl daddy: you think hes straight?

pretty setter: youre right...

owl daddy: he radiates gayy

kitten: he has a point

cat daddy: kurpooooooo

pretty setter: what

kitten: how do we change back... i dont like being small

owl daddy: is interesting having a nice bum

cat daddy: ........

kitten: ........

pretty setter: .......

author-chan: ........


	17. um late happy birthday bokuto

cat daddy: HEY HEY HEY

pretty setter: HEY HEY HEY

kitten: HEY HEY HEY

owl daddy: are you guys okay??????

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY!

cat daddy: happy birthday baby ilysm

pretty setter: happy birthday bo <3

kitten: oya? its your birthday? guess wooo is the hootiful one today 

owl daddy: bokuto.exe has stopped working

cat daddy: kenma......

pretty setter: used an owl pun.....?

kitten: i hate you guys

kitten: happy birthday ace :)

owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY THANKS GUYS


	18. BIRTHDAY PT2

cat daddy: oya oya oya? bokuto are you having a good birthday?

owl daddy: ngl id rather be with you all but i appreciate the volleyball tickets!!!

kitten: dumbass we're going to the game with you

owl daddy: OYA OYA? THEN LETSGOOOOOOOO

pretty setter: ....................... okay

kitten: then dinner so dont eat all the arena food

owl daddy: okay :(((((((

pretty setter: dont spoil your appetite bokuto-san. 

owl daddy: okay :)))

cat daddy: he really only has two moods, anyways we're outside bokuto

owl daddy: YAY be out in a minute


	19. BODY SWAP 2??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> woah three chapters?? who am i
> 
> kitten- akaashi  
> owl daddy- kenma  
> cat daddy - bokuto  
> pretty setter - kuroo

owl daddy(kenma): ummm....

owl daddy: something feels off...

pretty setter(kuroo): akaashi youre so gorgeous wow... your body...

kitten(akaashi): nice to know a pervert was in my body

cat daddy(bokuto): HEY HEY HEY

cat daddy: IM IN MY BROS BODY, KENMA COME HERE

owl daddy: no

cat daddy: BUT YOURE IN MY BODY?? WHO'S IN YOURS??

kitten: akaashi

cat daddy: akaashi come here,,,,

owl daddy: dont

owl daddy: you

owl daddy: fucking

owl daddy: DARE

owl daddy: HISSES

cat daddy: wow didnt know he did that

kitten: sigh... kenma i wont

owl daddy: good.........

pretty setter: bro ill come over

kitten: NO NO NO

cat daddy: *evil laughs*

owl daddy: why dont you say *kuroo laughs* because it has the same energy??

kitten: fair point

cat daddy: oop-

pretty setter: IM COMING OVER NOW

kitten: NO


	20. Kenma kozumes birthday

Owl daddy: HEY HEY HEY WE GOT A BIRTHDAY TODAY

Pretty setter: kenma happy birthday 🥰

Cat daddy: did akaashi use emoijis... 

Pretty setter: ive done it before.... 

Cat daddy: sorry it surprises me every time

Kitten: why is my phone blowing up. 

Owl daddy: KITTEN HAPPY BIRTHDAY 

kitten: thanks. 

Cat daddy: happy birthday kitten 🥰

Kitten: thank you

Pretty setter: do you have any plans? 

Kitten: not really. Probably play video games 

Pretty setter: what if we go out instead? 

Kitten: where? 

Owl daddy: wherever your heart desires!

Kitten: arcade? 

Cat daddy: i knew he'd say that

Owl daddy:🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ 

Pretty setter: congrats you were right pain in the ass kuroo san. 

Cat daddy: i feel like it gets longer every time you say it

Pretty setter: no♥️

Kitten: anyways

Owl daddy: we'll be there in 10! 

Kitten: ok

* * *

[Commission me 🤪](http://ko-fi.com/noodlecup/commissions)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys: 
> 
> http://ko-fi.com/noodlecup/commissions
> 
> I am starting fanfic commissions ! These can be reader x character or your favorite ship. 1, 000 words starts at $5  
> ALSO - if you want to be apart of the added series and have your own texting fic with your favorite team/characters/etc thats $10 for 20+ chapters :))))))


	21. Chapter 21

Owl daddy: i cant believe kubros birthday is soon😭😭

Cat daddy: ew don't remind me

Pretty setter: are you not looking forward to spending time with us? 

Cat: yeah are you. 

Cat daddy: thats not it.. idk just old ig

Cat: it's only a year

Cat daddy: yeah but a year closer to being without you all

Owl daddy: ..................... 

Pretty setter: you broke him... 

Cat: he wont stop sobbing 🤡

Owl daddy: I DONT WANNA SKDXJJXJCJCHCH

cat daddy: what-

Pretty setter: *sigh* he doesn't want to live without us

Cat daddy: BROKUTOOOOOOO

owl daddy: KUBROOOOOOO

cat: and theyre back

Pretty setter: i don't get paid enough 

Cat: you get paid? 

Pretty setter: no. Thats the problem. 


	22. kuroos birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hello its kuroos birthday where i am so enjoy,,,, check end notes and let me know

owl daddy: have you seen akaashi or kenma?

cat daddy: i havent....

cat daddy: its been a while...

cat: hey kuro come over

cat daddy: kenma,,,,,, what??

cat: i said what i said tf

pretty setter: bokuto-san go to kenmas as well

owl daddy: WE GOINBG TO KITTIES KUROO

cat: i regret this already

cat daddy: dont say that kitty!

pretty setter: just hurry up.

owl daddy: otw!!

cat daddy: bro....

owl daddy: what??

cat daddy: bro....

owl daady: kuroo youre scaring me

cat daddy: i have been blessed... oh god so blessed. kenma in a maid outfit and akaashi in a bunny costume i just- 

owl daddy: AKAASHI IN A WHAT

pretty setter: bunny.

owl daddy: oh lord im gonna die

cat: happy birthday kuro <3 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i have been in a writing frenzic and was wondering if i should do another texting chat like a part 2 of added??? i miss my chaotic boys pls,,, anyways let me know if i should <3

**Author's Note:**

> I thrive from chaos


End file.
